Fantasy Land

NFL network aired a segment today that showed how the Ravens could shut down the Patriots.  I thought well that's original, after all they only KICKED THE SNOT out of the Pats in the divisional round of the playoffs last year..  so it stands to reason that they would need an analytic tutorial on how to do it again.  Why not show a segment that shows how a team with a sub par running game, and now that bat shit crazy Randy "the freak" Moss is gone has no deep threat can beat arguably the best defensive team in the league!?!?!  Now I realize that everybody outside of New England hates the Patriots, but how do the Ravens somehow come out looking like the more lovable franchise in this contest?  Art Modell stole the Browns from Cleveland and brought them to Baltimore!!  Ray Lewis is such a vicious bastard that he actually participated in a murder!!!  AND HE DID LESS TIME THAN PLAXICO BURRESS DID FOR SHOOTING HIMSELF!?!?!  I know that was like forever and a day ago..  but so was the last time the Patriots won a Super Bowl.  Get over hating TFB for being an every man hero.  Get over hating the hooded evil genius that lurks the sidelines muttering "Something.. something.. everything is proceeding as I have foreseen it." In terms of franchises that create reasons to hate them I still don't think the Pats have crossed the threshold of the Red Wings and their fans (Is there anyplace on earth worse than Detroit!?!?!), the Lakers with their rapist superstar (Kobe Bryant) and their resident psycho (Ron Artest), the Cowboys with their how in the name of all that's holy does this white haired ass bag hack head coach still find work??? (Wade Phillips) and supremely overrated douche bag quarterback (Tony Romo) and finally there is that baseball team from New York. (I can't say anything else about them because kids might be reading!!)

Damn!!  I just re-read what I wrote...  I think I have some unresolved sports issues!! HA!  Speaking of unresolved sports issues... fantasy football is in full swing again!! I can't help but wonder exactly how this is fun?!?  Every Sunday and Monday I watch the scores and stats of players and games I couldn't care less about in the hopes of beating one of my friends in a game that requires nothing more than clicking a mouse and moving a player.  At least an online match on Madden is interactive!!  Even after I said that I'm probably going to post this blog and then fret over which RB to start this week.  I'm addicted to make believe coaching!  And I'm not alone!!  It's like four square. Considering this rampant epidemic of the make believe taking over the real...  maybe we are in the Matrix!!!  Or maybe we're at level one of Inception...  wherever we are it feels like up is down and left is friggin diagonal!!

This is an election year.  The most fascinating thing is that the level of political discourse in this country has been reduced to the lowest common denominator.  Professional wrestlers say less offensive stuff about their opponents and the fans than politicians are saying lately.  One guy lies about being a Vietnam veteran. One woman can't decide if she's a witch.  A certified whack job from Alaska has become the spokesperson for the Tea Party Movement.  A B-Movie actor and political satirist has somehow become the voice of reason.  Rush Limbaugh did a guest voice on the Family Guy.  Let me say that again... RUSH LIMBAUGH DID A GUEST VOICE ON THE FAMILY GUY!!!  At some point we should all be asking ourselves the simple question:  Is this really the best we can do?  Do I really want a government run by people who are so eager to be zealots that they say "You're either with us or against us."  This has been going on for a decade.  Wrestling got clean and politics got straight crazy!!! 

Well if you are still reading this then you obviously have as much time on your hands as I do and if that's the case then you have my sympathies.